One of the most fascinating patterns I see in my clients—especially those coming to me for smoking cessation or weight loss—is that sometimes, they aren’t holding onto their habit because they want to…
They’re holding onto it because giving it up would feel like giving power to someone else.
This can happen in response to someone who is currently in your life. But even more interestingly, it can also happen in response to people from your past.
The Subconscious Doesn't Recognize Time
Your subconscious mind operates differently than your conscious mind. It doesn’t track time the way you do, and it doesn’t necessarily realize that certain people are no longer in your life.
So if, at some point in your past, someone criticized your habit or your body, your subconscious may still be responding to that person—even if they’re long gone.
For example:
💬 If you had a parent or partner who constantly criticized your weight, your subconscious may resist losing weight because it doesn’t want them to "win."
💬 If someone in your life hated your smoking habit and always nagged you about it, your subconscious may cling to the habit as an act of defiance.
Even though you want to change, your subconscious is running an old program that says, “If I change, it means they were right.”
How This Plays Out in Real Life
Example #1: The Smoking Habit That Wouldn’t Budge
I once had a client who had been smoking for years. She genuinely wanted to quit, but every time she tried, she felt resistance.
In hypnosis, we uncovered that her ex-husband had always nagged her about her smoking. He constantly complained about the smell, told her how bad it was for her, and pressured her to quit.
💡 The subconscious takeaway? Giving up smoking would feel like agreeing with him. It would be like admitting he was right all along, and she just couldn’t allow that.
Once we helped her subconscious remove him from the equation—and recognize that quitting was about her, not him—the resistance disappeared, and she quit smoking with ease.
Example #2: The Bride Who Couldn’t Lose Weight
A young woman came to see me for weight loss. She wanted to take off some weight, but there was a big problem—her fiancé had told her:
"When you lose 20 pounds, we can start planning the wedding."
Ouch.
She felt completely stuck.
On one hand, she did want to lose the weight. But on the other hand, doing it because he told her to felt like admitting that she wasn’t marriage material at her current size.
Her subconscious resisted the weight loss because she didn’t want him to have power over her body.
So what did we work on?
💡 Boundaries.
We helped her subconscious recognize that her body was her decision—always. She wasn’t going to change her body to please someone else, but she also wasn’t going to keep weight on out of defiance.
Once she reclaimed her own power, the weight started coming off naturally.
Are You Subconsciously Letting Someone Else Control You?
This pattern plays out in so many ways:
✔️ Holding onto weight because someone told you to lose it
✔️ Clinging to a bad habit because someone nagged you about it
✔️ Keeping a behavior, not because you love it, but because you refuse to let someone else "win"
It’s tricky because it’s not a conscious decision.
Your subconscious is trying to protect you—but in doing so, it’s actually keeping you stuck.
How Hypnotherapy Helps You Take Back Control
When I work with clients on habits like smoking or weight loss, I’m not just putting them into hypnosis and saying, “You don’t smoke anymore” or “You eat less now.” That’s not how change works.
Instead, we go deeper.
We find out where the resistance is coming from and what the subconscious is trying to protect.
💡 We help the subconscious recognize that you’re not making changes to please or defy anyone—you’re doing it for YOU.
And once that shift happens? The struggle disappears.
✨ If this resonates with you, let’s talk. You don’t have to stay stuck in a battle with someone else’s voice. Hypnotherapy can help.
💬 Book a free consultation: https://www.yourauthenticself.ca/free-consultation
Want to Help Others Break Free from These Patterns?
If you’re fascinated by how the subconscious works and want to help people break free from emotional and behavioral struggles, why not become a hypnotherapist? My Whole Brain Hypnotherapy Certification Training teaches you the most effective ways to work with the subconscious mind.
💡 Try the first two units for FREE! 👉 https://www.horizoncenterhypnotherapy.com/free-trial
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